38 weeks down....2 weeks to go!

I am SO done!

And if anyone tells me to be patient again I will blow my top! For the most part, the last few weeks have been just fine. I feel good physically but emotionally I am a time bomb! I am really tired of feeling like a lunatic! I cry at everything...and I have no idea when I will just lose it and and start crying...and I'm talking WAILING....not just tears and sobs....but actual "I need to bury my head in a pillow so no one thinks I've lost it" wailing.

I am so anxious for Hazel to be here and I am trying to be patient. I am looking forward to going into labor...but not labor itself! I have gone through all her drawers for the millionth time. Today I counted her outfits out of boredom....(Daddy I think we may need a few more!) I have turned on her swing and bouncer more times than I can count, and anytime someone comes over I show them every outfit I have for her and show them all her "gear." She will be one swinging, bouncing, strolling baby!

I can't wait to hold my little Bird. I can't wait to smell her, and kiss her sweet head, and put her toes in my mouth...I can't wait to look at her little hands and nibble on her nose. I love her more than I ever thought was humanly possibly and I cannot imagine loving her more but I know I will...and I can't imagine how my heart will hold it all. See?! I'm crying again! Tom and I are already trying to figure out how on earth we will ever be able to let her go. I try to imagine how it is at all possible for me to parent her as well as my parents parented me.

Spring is here...and I am watching our backyard turn from a brown yuckiness to green green green! I can't wait until the trees are full of leaves, the flowers are blooming and it is warm enough to sit out on our rocking chairs with Hazel and enjoy it all.

Well, I'm gong to go bury my head in a pillow now and pray that Hazel comes very soon....

9 Weeks to Go!!!

So a lot has happened since my last post. Tom picked up the baby furniture and set it up to surprise me! It was so nice of him and I knew it was hard work because he did it all himself...he is a proud Daddy already!

Aunt Rachel started a mural of a tree in Hazel's room...I can't wait to see the finished product, it looks awesome already!

Baby Hazel seems to be doing well. She is a little kicker and when I think it is time to rest she thinks it is time to start jumping around...I love every minute of it! She is getting pretty strong. Daddy and I can feel her kick especially hard at around 4 to 5AM every morning...I think she is telling me it's time to eat!

I have bought Hazel lots of clothes...I just can't resist. One of my favorite (and less practical) picks was a little denim skirt and red and white polka dot top to match...so sweet!!!

Tom and I have been reading to Hazel, and our favorite book is Sheep in a Jeep...if you've never read it, pick it up or check it out and give it a read...it's pretty quick. It's makes me and Tom laugh so hard because Tom has a jeep, and like in the book, Tom's Jeep was "Jeep in a heap." The last line of the book is "Jeep for sale-cheap." We just love it and I nearly have it memorized. I also bought On the Night You Were Born which is also pretty sweet. We plan to read it to her when she arrives....

We went to our first Childbirth class last Saturday...it was long and tiring!!! There are two more and they look like they'll be pretty interesting.

I saw the doctor last on February 1. He said I my uterus was measuring big, so we'll have an ultrasound in about 5 weeks to see how big Hazel is. My glucose test was fine, I've only gained 10 lbs, and my blood pressure is good.

I am feeling pretty good too, except for some problems sleeping...nothing a little Tylenol PM or Unisom can't handle! I had bad headaches early one, but none for a while and this makes me very happy, headaches stink!

I have a baby shower in Quincy this weekend, I am excited about it but not looking forward to the long drive...I'm sure I'll be fine though and the trip with Mom and Rach will be fun. Plus I get to see family and show off my belly...I love my belly!!!!

That's all for now!!!

We're Having a Girl ! ! !

On November 17 we went to have our Ultrasound. It was absolutely amazing to see our baby and all its little parts!!! Rachel was with us and was there when the tech told us that we are having a GIRL! I just knew it was a girl, so I wasn't too surprised...I was more surprised that I was right! Daddy joked and asked the tech to check again...it was funny. Daddy was amazed at seeing her too....it was awesome!!! The Tech let Uncle Sam, Grandma Becky and Amanda come in the room and see her too. They had been waiting in the waiting room to celebrate with us and I am so glad they all got a peek. Mom gave us some cute pink socks after the Ultrasound (she had blue ones too just in case!).

After we were done we got some pictures of the baby and then I called my Dad and Tom called his parents. They were all very happy. Then we met up with Mom, Sam, Rach and Amanda at Panera. I was happy to have the rest of the day off to see Sam a bit. He'll miss Thanksgiving this year because he'll be at Pilot Training.

On Wednesday the 18th, Mom, Rach and I went to Quincy to see Grandpa Marcks. He is sick. It was nice being able to see him and spend time with my family. I showed off the pictures of our girl. Right now, the plan is to name her Hazel. It's the color of my eyes, and well, it's the only one we can both agree on. Rach and I spent some time with our friend Julie and I bought a few outfits for Hazel....so cute!!!

I have felt more movement in the last couple of days. This morning she was kicking (or head butting....who knows...) the top of my belly...I could feel it at my belly button....I am really enjoying her and hope she is cozy in there. I can't wait to hold her!

I went to my doctor today and she went through the Ultrasound results and said that Hazel looks healthy and that she is growing within normal range. I am also doing well. We go back in 4 weeks.

17 Weeks down, 23 to go!

Two more weeks until our Ultrasound. I can't wait to find out what we are having!!! We invited Rachel to go along and see her little niece or nephew; I will be very happy to have her there!

It seems like time is going by very quickly now....those first few weeks seemed to take forever!!! I have been on an emotional roller coaster. Some days I am ridiculously happy and others I am near tears for no good reason.

One day early on I was feeling pretty down. I went to the mall, spent way too much money (Who needs 4 bottles of shower gel from Bath and Body Works at one time?!), and burst into tears when a shop girl was nice to me. Then on a whim I went for a haircut (turned out great, thank goodness!) and called my Mom to come over that night and keep me company. Before she came over I was watching a show I had on DVR and the opening song made me cry, so I paused it, cried for two minutes, then stopped crying as suddenly as it started and resumed watching the show....bizarro. When Mom came I cried again. I told her, "This is a big deal! This is really heavy!" That's pretty much the only time I freaked out.

So I pretty much feel like I've lost my mind some days. I forget where things always have been. I am very forgetful. I just don't feel like myself. I have the same workload at work but it seems like too much now. And I am sleepy and ready for bed most nights by 7PM! The time change didn't help either!

I am also having issues sleeping. I wake up hungry in the middle of the night, even though I try to eat something before bed...and once my belly wakes up the rest of me can't sleep! I have ended up snacking then moving to the couch most some nights around 4AM. The couch and I are becoming good friends.

Overall though, I feel great. Saturday I shopped all day! I couldn't believe I lasted that long! I still haven't gained any weight which my doctor is happy about. And I am too! My belly feels different every day and I am loving each new day and feeling something a little different...even if sometimes the things I feel aren't that great.

I think Tom and I might go check out baby things this weekend. Tom really wants the baby to have new baby furniture so I may take him to a fancy baby store and show him the $900 cribs... :)

How We Found Out We Were Pregnant

I had a miscarriage in 2007. Since then my cycle has varied from 28 to 30 days. Whenever I was past 28 days I would get excited, spend money on pregnancy tests, then become disappointed when they were negative.

August 5, 2009 was day 28 of my cycle and I really didn't think anything of it. When nothing happened on August 6 I decided to buy a pregnancy test. I went to Target and bought a two pack of generic tests. I went back to work after lunch, left the box in my car so no one at work would see it and took a test; it was negative. The next day, Friday August 7 (day 30 of my cycle), I still hadn't started. So after lunch I took another test; still negative! I decided that if I hadn't started by Monday I would call my doctor.

Friday night I was home alone. I was cleaning out my car and picked up the pregnancy test box. I glanced at the box, then looked again, and realized that my pregnancy tests had been positive!!! I freaked out! I had expected the test to have a + sign, but the generic test I bought just had a line to indicate pregnancy! I felt so dumb!!!

I called Rachel and asked her to come over but she was downtown with friends. I told her I was pregnant and that I read the tests wrong. I was so excited and I think she was too! Then I called my friend Marlene and asked her to come over. I went to Walgreens and bought another test....one with a plus sign! Marlene came over and I took the test again....POSITIVE! I couldn't believe it....I really couldn't......

Tom was at work that night and he got home after 1:30AM. I woke up to use the potty (shocker right?!) and then I went into the living room. Tom was laying on the couch and I leaned over it and said, "Guess what? I'm pregnant." I think he said, "Noooo way!" He was so excited that he wanted me to stay up with him but I had to get back to bed because I was on call the next day. I showed Tom a cute onesie I had bought at a craft show the previous year, Mom and Rach encouraged me to buy it....It is a cardinals onesie that says "Baby Bird" on it. It's perfect for our baby because Tom and I call each other Bird.

After work on Saturday the 8th Tom and I went to the Doran's house for Sean's graduation party. My parents were there and I wanted to tell them ASAP. Tom and I asked my parents to come into a bedroom at the Doran's so we could talk to them. We told them we had something to talk to them about and they looked at us with fear on their faces (they thought something had gone wrong with our home purchase)...I said, "Show'em Tom..." and Tom pulled the onesie out of his pocket and held it Mom. My mom knew instantly what it meant and they were both thrilled.

We then told Pat and her family and they were so happy for us too!

Tom and I went to his parents house and told them next....they were so excited! Shari had wondered why I turned down the wine she offered me!

Of course, with all the excitement I was still scared of another miscarriage...but I just knew this time was different and I pray every day that everything continues to go well!

14 and 1/2 weeks

It is Sunday and last night was the best night of sleep I've gotten in the last 4 or 5 days! Thank goodness! Sleeping has become difficult and I really have no idea why. I feel pretty good, I go to bed at 9 or 10 but I am waking up around 2 or 3 AM when Tom comes to bed and then I just can't fall back asleep. Not fun! A few nights I have ended up on the couch (not comfortable) or in the recliner (doable, but I thought I'd be sleeping in the recliner much later in pregnancy! Oh well!) Hopefully this will improve soon! I am also losing feeling in my legs when I lay or recline on my back which my doctor said was normal....

I am into maternity clothes....it was that or buy my favorite jeans in a larger size...not flattering at all. The maternity jeans stay up pretty well but some days it seems as though I've lost weight and I am tugging on them....I have a couple things I use to keep them up; a belly band (very handy) or a sweatshirt that is tighter along the bottom. I also have moved on to a couple of shirts because my regular shirts aren't all long enough to cover the panel on the pants....I am having a hard time finding clothes in my size in stores so I ordered some online last night, hopefully they will work!

Last Tuesday we heard the baby's heartbeat for the 1st time! That was really exciting! I have no idea why but I think we are having a girl. Everyone else thinks its a boy. Either way I will be thrilled!!!

In 5 weeks (November 17) we get an Ultrasound and the doctor thinks we will get to find out what the baby is (and if my instincts are correct?!)! We can't wait!

Mom, Rachel and I went to the Bentonville, AR area Friday night and stayed over until Saturday. We had a great time and I bought a couple of Christmas gifts and a cute little cow for the baby's room. Next weekend is Rachel's fall party!!! Yeah! I love sitting around the fire and eating smores.....speaking of eating.....I haven't gained any weight (in fact I've lost 5lbs) and my doctor said that this is great for me. I think my food aversions and my stinky garage have helped with this! LOL!

Tom is already a great Daddy....he gets me snacks and drinks when I ask ("Tom, it's for the baby!") and when he can he helps to keep from having to go in the stinky garage....it makes me gag! I got him a cute bib (for the baby of course) that says, "My Dad is Cooler Than Your Dad." I think he liked it.

In a few weeks, I should start feeling the baby, I can't wait for this and I can't wait until Tom can feel it kick and move around! We are really looking forward to this adventure!